i think it's a very amusing fact that it seems i'm one of the few that still goes online and blog during this crucial period of "study break" so to speak..and given that i still have yet to start proper on my revision, i guess i'm one of the few (if not the only) persons that will have to struggle during the last week trying to cram everything we had learnt so far into our brains..no i'm not not heeding the advice of the teachers who already announced we would not have enough time to study for a good grade if we don't start soon, but just that..i just don't feel like starting!! haha ok ok carmen..i'll start soon..real soon..ok? :P
nothing is happening in my life, because i had just been sleeping, eating, slacking throughout the days till this moment..haha never been out since erm..sat? after the concert..the most terrible thing is, i'm kind of in cold war with my mum..haha how to describe it? it was mon that it started lah..cause i reminded her what she wanted to do that day after i woke up..den when she asked whether like will i go help her with it i just keep silent..then..yep i think i was in deep thinking after that that when she tried to ask me to eat so that i can go out with her to help her i didn't hear her, and of course i did not reply..so she just went out of the house and when she got back i realise she's angry at me..haha how to say? cuz i did not reply her and did not offer to help her..so from that day on we did not talk at all till now..partially also because i did not want to say sorry to her or try doing anything to please her..it's that stubborn part of me coming up again..bleah..i wondered how come this part of me did not change even after i discover it, like all my characteristics slowly fade away after i realise their existence..the stubborn part of me, in simpler word, is the me that is determined not to say something though i am clear that once i say that something, the unhappiness will be resolved..like me and my friend were in a argument and something happened that i knew if i apologise first, regardless of who is the right one, the argument would be ok and we'd be happy again..but the more i recognise the need to say i'm sorry, the more i can't bring myself to say it..and usually i would feel like crying because i just couldn't bring myself to say it although i know i NEED to..anyway in the end i'd be the one who say sorry..but that would be after..erm at least 10 mins of struggle? haha but my point is, this time round i think i missed the opportunity of saying sorry (just like some other times) and well, i guess it'll have to stay this way?
rah..why am i typing this into my blog? lol i guess this is quite a private post right? haix..whatever..
ok..erm..i guess i'll try to stay away from the com for a few days (hopefully) and try to get as much concepts into my brain as possible..so i won't update le i guess..wish all of u out there to jia you!! we can do it!! haha i guess that's all for now then..
till next time! :)