heeheehee. let's talk about death.
Just kidding! But that did flash through my mind when I read the yahoo news on palliative care, and what edward poon (and all the other speakers) said during ASPAN came into mind. And I think, I am still not ready to talk about death, not about myself nor about my family nor my friends. Okay now I'm thinking of CSI hahaha. Like how initially I'd think I want to die while sleeping and painlessly, but Grissom's speech about being diagnosed with cancer and having time to say goodbye make sense too. Not that it is practical from the healthcare perspective, since cancer is actually a painful death for the patient and her family, and sometimes too slow. Then again, if it is true that the prof from Tuesdays with Morris can have time to prepare for his death and said enough goodbyes, maybe there will come a day where that can be achieve by everyone, everyone having a "good death" because everything would be by then taken care of. Still, death IS a taboo I guess.
RAH. I'm bored. I went to use the CAP calculator online and discover if I were to pull up my CAP to 3.5 at least by next sem, I would need at least 2 A- AND 2 A for my 4 nursing modules, which is, as difficult for me to get as for human to live on mars. haha see that I use an example that is not entirely impossible :P I think I am quite boostful to believe in myself thus much given all the examples thus far, but I still want to believe in myself. Erm, and whether it happens really depends on later if the effort to exercise my belief comes in later :x hahaha okay that sounds like I can have any grade as long as I work for it, which is apparently not the case. So maybe I shall settle with at least a B for everything next sem, to at least secure a pass with merit for my degree? :)
tudou is annoying. I have no idea when it will work fine and when it will not, and when i let my hopes up and guards down, it always plays with my nerves. Like appearing to have loaded fully but fail to play HALFWAY, and refuse to load when i refresh the page, so I have to ctrl+r for multiple times and skip to the point i stopped and painstakingly wait for it to load one sentence by one sentence. which may stop loading halfway again so i have to redo the above steps over and over again. but when it is nice, I can finish 1 season of CSI in 2 days. haix does it have mood swings like me?
oh and we celebrated my dad's birthday today! haha he cooked a very delicious and sumptuous dinner with crab and whole chicken and stuff, and he made curry bun and soy bean in the afternoon, and he bought grapes and we bought cake for him. so basically, the food is still going down from my throat as I type this and I could feel the bloatedness hahaha. but it is really very nice :D and WE played nice and tried to speak more in cantonese so that he understands, and try to engage him. Next up will be mum's! next year LOL and i sure hope to remember the lesson from this year and really celebrate for her, because this unfilial daughter (me) was playing com games when my parents start to cut cake and only my parents were there, and apparently mum was VERY upset. and I am still feeling guilty. I'm going to remember to disengage myself from any distractions next year and really celebrate for my mum next year :D
hrm. wonder why people only really learn the lessons that happen on themselves and not others, even when the lessons from others are there for them to see and be alert.