lala~~
been tinking alot within today after the game with carmen..lalala maybe i AM over protecting myself..but it's in such a way tt i don't know that i am protecting myself..i mean..i told everyone i wanna be frank..and now i realise tt maybe my frankness still have something unsaid that is in my heart..and now the problem is: how do i retrive it when i don't even know its existence..?haha tt's enough for me to ponder till the end of the day i think..
i admit tt i'm unstable lah..and i'll think thru which is the best way to say things before saying it out..hmmm...shall do self reflection in my diary soon..like it's always filled with these kind of thing lo..and i realise..when i'm irritated or dunno wat to say they'll just think tt i'm angry..like pls lah..when can a person (a person like me) be angry for the half of the day tt she's "not happy"..wah dunno how these ppl think one..
anyway..there was a fuss over the releasing of results this afternoon as everyone noe..haha and MANY ppl wish that it's not true..so supposed it's not true..?cuz it's really TOO early if moe were early for 2 days lah get wat i mean..?and how come some 8pter go pioneer..?kinda ridiculous lah actually rite..?haha yay anyway whateva will come will come so fret now oso no use..but i dun tink it's real lah :)
having chuida this fri too..haha and ny got the day off..wondering if ppl go up to the principal will she agree again to let us off for the day..?tink not leh..haix..
erm..went for tjco audition today..and i din got in..tink it's not really a surprise for everyone lah..since like kaoji i scored the lowest..den i'm always the one being shifted everywhere and i'm the one whom ppl just critise without caring for anything..the critism maybe good but..they dun do tt to everyone but me in particular..realli wateva lah..haha ya anyway dunno whether i shld feel relieved or sad..relieved is tt my life will be much easier this way.. (but i wonder now if i still have the scholarship..my life's in a mess now literally) sad is cuz i failed my first ever audition..can see where is my standard rite..?and not going back to the east after first three mths kinda set how the things will be going on for me and my friends..haha shall not feel insecure..not now..
ya a pt to take note..this is the first post tt i write at home for the week!! haha nice rite..?got to use the com for myself after helping my sis to type in her three CG contact list..sian diao~
lol but still v bored..i wonder if everyday of my life will be as unproductive and boring..but tink i'll start studying after jae? (haha this is another way of pushing things back to infinity..cuz the after-thingie always push to even later..)
hmm...shall end my post here..
for everyone..
GOOD LUCK!! AND BE HAPPY NO MATTER WHERE YOU ARE POSTED TO!! :)